Best One-Liners

Because Jenn and I don’t always get to be the most creative at our day jobs, sometimes a little of that creativity and downright kookiness lands over here in FBG City. In preparation for this celebratory week, we’ve had fun looking back on the year and remembering some of the fun posts we’ve written. I know we’re always cracking each other up with some of the random phrases that come out of our mouths (or flow through the keyboard), and we hope that we bring a little fitness fun into your days. Here are some random one-liners, taken completely out of context, that made us laugh. Have fun guessing what we were really talking about (click on the “source” link to see if you’re right!).

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. Your spandex is so lovely and your belted manpris enable such free movement. (Source)

And I quote, “Waxing is not for the scrotum!” (Source)

So off we go to the lonely park, where she sniffs around and eats mud. (Source)

“If I hear one more ‘He could go all the way!’ I’m going to scream. Turn the M-effer off!!!” (Source)

Neither of us really wanted to mount (pun intended) one of these babies into our living quarters. (Source)

Heck, even Emeril is diggin’ the nuts these days. (Source)

If it doesn’t get you moving, you’re basically a cold fish. A cold, dead fish. (Source)

After drinking too much eggnog and skipping her meds, Grandma stumbles out in the snow and gets run over. (Source)

“Why are the Turkish into torture?” (Source)

Then you get to make like an elk and practice a mating dance. (Source)

It was only a matter of days before I repeated the act with my own dog. (Source)

Nothing like feigning death to make you feel alive. (Source)

We’re talking a movie-theater size torso. (Source)

I expected everyone to turn and look at me, to hit the brakes in their cars and ask me what I was doing or if I needed help returning to the loony bin. (Source)

—Erin