★FitStars: Girls on the Run’s Molly Barker
November 4, 2009 by Jenn
Erin and I started FBG to make working out and eating right fun and accessible to women of all shapes and sizes, no matter where they were on their fitness journeys. FBG isn’t about being perfect, but about being real, laughing at yourself often and really enjoying a balanced and sane life. And we always thought that once we had a readership that was large enough to make a difference (and hence some funds to contribute) that we’d give back. Well, I’m happy to report that that day has come. It’s giveback time! You guys already know that I’m running the marathon for SoleMates to benefit Girls on the Run (GOTR), but we wanted to do a little bit more for the nonprofit after-school running program for young girls that uses running to transform the way girls see themselves and their opportunities. That’s why today’s FitStars interview is with Molly Barker, the founder of GOTR. Molly is totally inspiring. She’s a four-time Hawaii Ironman triathlete with expertise in counseling and research on adolescent issues. Her organization is truly changing the mindset of young girls and introducing them to the positive powers of running. The GOTR program combines training for a 5K event with life-changing self-esteem enhancing lessons that enhance social, physical and mental health in 8- to 12-year-old girls. It’s amazing. If you have a daughter this age, I highly recommend you see if there’s a GOTR chapter in your area. Read on to learn more about why Molly does what she does, her thoughts on the “boy box,” how she stays so motivated and what’s next for GOTR! (Plus, details on how we’re giving back with your help!)
- FBG: According to your bio, you got the idea to start GOTR during a sunset run in 1993. Where did you get the idea and how has it changed from that first spark?
- MB: At age 11, I stepped into the “Girl Box.” The Girl Box is a place many girls go, around middle school, where morphing into what they think they should be becomes more important than just celebrating who they are. For years, I struggled trying to conform to the standards and lifestyle defined by the Girl Box. At age 32, I hit bottom. On the following day, July 7, 1993, while out on a run, I had an epiphany. About mile four of that run, something dramatic happened. I felt complete, whole and “in-powered” and knew that from that step on, I would do everything in my power to help girls and women recognize and achieve their greatest human potential.
- FBG: How does GOTR help girls break out of the Girl Box?
- MB: The messages of the Girl Box vary, but the overarching theme comes from a culture rooted in the belief that girls and women must conform to a set of standards that are unattainable and dangerous to our health and well-being. “You’re not smart enough,” “You’re too smart,” “You’re not thin enough,” “You’re too fat,” “You’re too loud,” “You’re too quiet,” “You’re not pretty enough,” are a few of the more well-known Girl Box messages. Girls on the Run educates and inspires third- through eighth-grade girls to stay true to themselves—to discover a life free of the Girl Box, where they can say, “I AM enough and I belong just the way I am.”
- FBG: In GOTR, you obviously focus on running. Why running? And why is the 5K at the end of the program so critical?
- MB: For me, running is the sanctuary in my day, when I am free of any expectations or judgments. Running can serve many purposes. Time alone, time with friends, time to think, time to NOT think, time to train, time to relieve stress…the list is as long as there are runners! What I do know is, it represents something unique for every girl in our program…running has no meaning to her, until she gives it meaning. That’s what the curriculum provides for the girls. An opportunity to explore the Girl Box and give running meaning beyond competition or cardiovascular functioning. The end-of-season New Balance Girls on the Run 5K is the dot on the timelines of their lives to mark the experience and to provide for them a lasting memory…a memory they can engage the next time they are afraid, lack confidence or are challenged. “If I can do this 5K, just think of all the other amazing things I can do!”
- FBG: How has running and working out regularly changed your life? How has it affected your confidence?
- MB: My relationship with running has evolved over the years. In my teens, it was a space of self-discovery. I learned the capabilities of my body, a gentle understanding of how my breathing, pace and lifestyle were all connected. In my twenties it served as a vehicle to meet people…a social life. Running also provided for me a feeling of comfort and “power” in my skin. I liked the effect it had on my appearance and this provided for me the self-confidence I needed to navigate first jobs, new cities and the singles scene. In my thirties, I stepped “off track.” I was competing in Ironman-length competitions and I lost sight of the joy and found myself running from my problems rather than toward serenity. Running became a crutch rather than a strength. I could numb out on the endless hours of training. And now in my forties, my love for the sport is full-force. I run every other morning, before sunrise, listen to my feet scuffle through autumn leaves and feel grateful for my body, my age and the place to which running has carried me.
- FBG: Most of our readers are out of their teenage years, and many serve as role models for younger girls. If you could give our readers a few words of wisdom about what they can do for the younger generation, what would it be? Do mothers with daughters play a special role?
- MB: I think we all need to celebrate, honor and embrace our gifts. This includes speaking kindly about ourselves and others, avoiding gossip and verbal name-calling, and standing up for ourselves. Consider this question and then make a decision based upon your answer: Does this person/situation/circumstance honor, respect and elevate the ME of who I am…or does this person/situation/circumstance demean and limit the ME of who I am? Conversely, am I honoring, respecting and elevating the YOU in someone else? While I won’t always be “right on” with my response, this has been of great value in keeping me on center and true to myself.
- FBG: Here on FBG, we’re all about working out to feel better about ourselves no matter how big or small our fit bottoms are. How do you stay so balanced and focused when it comes to fitness, and do you ever have a day where you just don’t feel as fit as you’d like?
- MB: OH yeah. I travel quite a bit these days, and I’ll have to say, if I go three or more days without a good sweat I can start to get a little bit…oh, how shall I put it…mean. Even on the road, I try to hit the hotel fitness center. Thirty minutes is all it takes now and then to keep me motivated and “upbeat” for my day!
- FBG: GOTR obviously focuses on girls, but do you think that boys can get stuck in the “Boy Box?” Do you talk to your son about the same issues you address in GOTR?
- MB: Absolutely! Boys AND men definitely have their boxes. I do believe they are different. Boys’ stature in the world is based on material success, athletic prowess and sexual conquests. As with my daughter, I want both of my children to get past the value we place on external measures and celebrate, honor and respect people for the gifts and talents they provide in this world.
- FBG: Anything new in the works for GOTR? For you?
- MB: I’m currently re-writing our curriculum. It is important that we remain relevant to the girls we serve!
- FBG: What are your favorite forms of exercise?
- MB: Running, cycling, weight lifting.
- FBG: Any final words of advice for our readers?
- MB: Based on the fact that I am 49 years old, my sixth-grade daughter Helen, is getting a huge kick out of the fact that I am being interviewed by ANYTHING with “fit bottom” in the title. She isn’t sure whether to laugh out loud or be embarrassed by it. Ahhh, the angst of adolescence and having a “fit bottomed” mother.
Helen, be proud! Your mom is awesome! And because we so believe in this program, we’re donating $1 for every comment—up to $500—on this post. So comment away, dear readers! It’s for a good cause!!! —Jenn
I ran a marathon and raised money last year for GOTR and it is a fantastic organization. I wish they had a chapter in my city but unfortunately they do not at this time. Running has benefited me so greatly that I love that girls who may not have been introduced to it get a chance to experience the benefits of running in such a positive enviornment and atmosphere.
I started running about 8 months ago, and I’ve lost almost 40 pounds! I’m 27 and I really wish I had discovered how much fun running is at a younger ago. Girls on the Run is inspiring!
I think its great what Girls On the Run does. If only I’d heard about this three years ago. Best of luck to you.
I’m sure it’s been said many times, but having discovered my love of running late into my 20s, I really really wish an organization like GOTR had been around in my neighborhood when I was growing up young and not understanding the *mental* benefits of exercising. I’ve met a few women over the last two or three years who have volunteered for the Atlanta chapter and find myself inspired by them and their stories. So Kudos to Molly for founding such an important organization, kudos to everyone matching donations, and kudos to FBG for featuring this worthwhile cause!
I have recently started running again and weight lifting 3 days a week to get ready for my NPS training in January and man do I feel good. I have always been fairly active and I try to eat well but man it feels sooooooo good to run and lift. I am not a tiny girl by any means but I look so good in my own strong way and of course its amazing what it does for self confidence! I can take on anything! Having a goal to work for really helps me and its great!
this article has made my day – thanks for inspiring more people (including me) to follow your example and make a difference
I’m commenting again because it doesn’t say anything about “one comment per person”–I want y’all to meet your goals, girls! This is an awesome organization!
GOTR is a great organizations, thanks for a great read and for giving back! A group of us is currently bringing GOTR to Louisville, Kentucky. It’s a big task, but reading this helps me remember why we’re doing it. Thank you:)
This will be my first season as a running buddy for the GOTR Puget Sound, and I’m so excited to be a part of this wonderful and inspiring organization. It’s so important to teach girls at a young age just how valuable they are, I plan to be a part of GOTR for many years to come. Thanks for supporting!
I don’t have daughters, but I’ve heard great things about GOTR!
My 10 year old was involved in this program, and it has been tremendous! She comes home and talks about what they cover in the classes, and the information has been so beneficial in helping her understand that the advertisements and pictures of women everywhere are not real depictions of women. Also, she completed her first 5k this past weekend. I couldn’t be prouder of her! I love this program!
Girls on the Run is awesome!! Thanks for featuring Molly on your site and spreading the word about how folks can become involved in such a wonderful organization!!
GOTR sound’s like a great cause, especially knowing how running and has helped me!
How have we not hit 500 posts yet? C’mon folks, it only takes a second!
What a great cause! Thanks FBG & New Balance.
GOTR is an amazing organization!
Thank you for re-sharing this interview! I had heard of GOTR, but didn’t know much about it, I’m glad I’m more informed.
Such great stuuf & a great cause! Thank you! AND, I wear New Balance running shoes!!!
I wish I had begun the running habit earlier in life which makes this sound like a fantastic organization for any girl.
sounds like a great organization!
I recently ran in our local Girls on the Run 5K and it was one of the most inspiring and and FUN races I’ve run! The girls, and those who were there running with them, cheering them on, were AMAZING. I am a beginning runner, and I kept thinking, if these girls can do this, so can I! They inspired ME to run better and stay strong when I wanted to quit! I was so proud of each and every one of those girls, and I can’t wait until my daughter is old enough to participate in the GOTR program! It’s an empowering message of strength, self-confidence, and determination that I certainly want my daughter to have. Thanks GOTR!!
Molly has been my hero ever since reading her profile in the 2006 issue of Runner’s World where she was honored as a “hero of running.” And I’ve been involved with Girls on the Run ever since. Thank you for profiling her. And Jenn–best of luck to you at Disney! It was my first marathon too and you picked it for all the right reasons–fireworks, fanfare and flat!
Sounds like a great program!
I’m a huge fan of GOTR. As a coach in GA and in KS I have seen it really transform shy girls into confident young women. I enjoy running, and I’m proud to be a fit bottomed girl (and mother of two boys).
Great idea. I’m hopefully going to be assistant coaching for them in the spring!
Great organization and it’s wonderful what you girls are doing to help out! You rock!!
great cause.. Love this organization..
What a good cause! Way to go!
What a great way to give to a great cause!
GOTR is such a worthy organization. Bravo to you, Fit Bottomed Girls for generously supporting them and encouraging your readers to learn more about the great work they do. Happy Holidays to all!
What a great idea! Consider me having commented. Good luck and merry Christmas!
This is such an amazing organization!
I read about Girls on the Run and was instantly impressed and knew it was something I wanted to be involved in. I’ve signed up with the San Francisco chapter and will be coaching girls in the spring. I cannot wait to share my love of running and love of life with my team.
Awesome.
I love the idea of helping young ladies with self esteem. This is right on!
I can’t believe I forgot to comment on this post previously! Hopefully I’ll help you max out your giving.
Girls on the Run is a fantastic program! And coming from someone who has sufferend from low self-esteem, it is always nice to be able to support a program that helps encourage confidence and good habits in young girls/women.
I “jog, do HIIT & intervals that are not quite HIIT along with all kinds of other stuff! I did 5k’s when I was younger. What a great thing you are doing!
Awesome inspiration! I love to run and do it because it makes me see the world as a better place!
Wonderful work you are doing.
I ran the Girls on the Run 5K with my 9 year old daugther a few weeks ago – in the snow!!!!!! It was tough – but a great experience.
The program was run for the first time at my daughter’s elementary school in Northern Virginia by two great female teachers! Thank you to them (Erika and Marissa), Molly, FBG’s and everyone who has made this program such a huge success for our girls!
Donate!
GOTR is an amazing organization! I ran a maraton as a SoleMate in 2009 and had a wonderful experience!
Who can resist a chance to donate to a good cause just by leaving a comment? Not me!
This is the first time I’ve heard about GOTR. What a great program! I love that it focuses on girls right when they’re struggling with conforming to what they think is the ideal girl.
Thank you everyone involved in promoting this very worthy effort.
I ran a Girls on the Run 5k with one of my students, and ran the Chicago Marathon with Sole Mates this year. Simply put, GOTR has changed my life.
My first experience with Girls on the Run was just a few weeks ago – they had a bunch of girls running their first 5k at the same race I was at. It was so inspirational to see their running buddies build them up! Such a great program!
I’m a Phoenix, AZ GOTR supporter!!! Love love the blog!!!
GTOR is such an inspirational group. What great dedication by Molly Barker.