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Can’t, Won’t or Don’t Wanna?

Why do fall short of your goals? Sometimes it’s because I just. don’t. wanna. do it. Credit: edenpictures

I’m big—huge, actually—on setting goals for myself and following through. Or, at least, doing what I can to follow through. I don’t generally beat myself up for not achieving something I set my sights on, but, if I fall short, I like to figure out why. And, in my experience, the “why” tends to fall into one of three categories: Can’t, Won’t and Don’t Wanna.

Can’t is pretty self-explanatory. Say I had a goal time for a race. I trained properly, I followed my nutrition plan leading up to it and got a good night’s sleep the night before, and I still fell short. That’s a can’t. Also in the can’t category are goals like “swim faster than Ryan Lochte.” Given the amount of time I have to train, my age, and, you know, the fact that I’ve only been swimming for a couple of years, and it’s a definite can’t. And can’t, I don’t worry about. I can only do the best I can, you know?

Won’t and Don’t Wanna are a lot more common, somewhat intertwined, and a little harder to explain. Currently landing in my won’t pile is following a vegan diet. It’s something I could do in the future, and I love the idea, but I’m not there. I’m just not ready. So, the fact that I’m not currently eschewing eggs and dairy is very much a choice. I’m leaving it out there for the future, but I’m not going to sweat the fact that I haven’t make that leap just yet.

Don’t wanna is more along the lines of skipping a morning workout because I’ve got a meeting with my pillow, you know? Or ordering a big cheesy pasta dish instead of a veggie-filled salad when I go out to eat. My don’t wanna file is filled with the easy, one-off choices that I coulda-shoulda-woulda made. Don’t wanna is all those small choices that add up to big changes (which is why I’m so incredibly proud that I’m becoming a real and true morning exerciser; I’m working out three to four mornings a week before work!). And the don’t wannas? Those, I don’t like. Those are the ones that I know I’ll change next time.

When you don’t don’t meet a goal, do you try to analyze the reasons? Do you have categories like mine? —Kristen

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Comments

2 Comments
  1. Alison says:

    I also hate that crummy feeling in your stomach that you get when you fall short of a goal. For me, it’s morning exercise – I truly, really, genuinely want to become a morning exerciser, but getting to bed on time + preparing in advance so I don’t have to think about anything in the morning + carving out enough time in the AM are all so difficult for me. This post has encouraged me to try again though – have to keep trying to knock out all of those “don’t wannas”!

  2. I was just thinking of putting something like this together for our blog. I hear so many people talk about the “motivation roller coaster”, with the ups and downs of getting into (and out of) an exercise plan.

    I really found that making challenging goals has helped me keep my motivation no lower than a 7 or 8. I’m in the middle of training for an Ironman and have never been more determined about not only exercising, but getting great, effective workouts in every time out. Think lofty, yet achievable goals are a great way to keep yourself out of the don’t wanna column as well. Good post!

    Matt

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