He trains FBGs!

Why are you reading about dude-related stuff? Because it’s Fit Bottomed Dudes’ Week, that’s why! Click here for all the special posts, and please share with the guys in your life! 

Living with a Fit Bottomed Dude is definitely interesting. It involves 24/7 fit talk. The man manages a gym, he trains and he’s a workout warrior, so I’m constantly finding myself in conversations about lactic acid, playlists for Spin classes, the new hotness in gym equipment…It’s hilarious how things work out. (No pun intended.)

People ask me all the time what it’s like to live with a trainer/gym manager. Besides the fact that I have to listen to him putting together playlists for his classes every night, it’s pretty much nothing like any other relationship I’ve ever been in. (You thought I was going to say it’s normal, didn’t you? Ha! Fooled you!)

Living with a Fit Bottomed Dude means I’m constantly witnessing random ish. By “random,” I mean he’ll be chilling on the couch one minute, and the next he’s mimicking the perfect squat. I’m not gonna lie. It’s scared me and caused me to pull my chin into my throat in shock on a number of occasions.

Typical FBD baggage.

It also means I hear nothing but stuff like, “I’m hungry. I had four workouts today. Protein, please!” There’s no chilling and being lazy in bed on a Sunday morning, either. A Fit Bottomed Dude says he wants to relax, but that just means an extra five minutes in bed. Then he’s up wanting to hike, run or do something that involves movement. He went crazy the first time we went to the beach together. The man can’t just lay out. He has to be playing football or kicking up sand like a kid who’s had one too many candy bars.

Living with this kind of dude also means I get teased by association. People are always giving us a hard time about our eating habits…we MUST be total health nuts who only eat sprouts and hug every dang tree that comes across our path. Yes, we enjoy making homemade granola, but pizza is also my favorite meal of all time. ALL TIME. I have to deal with people’s shock when they figure out I’m not a clean-eating machine.

Living with an FBD means I never get to skip out on a workout that I want to avoid just because. There are no excuses in an FBD household!

There are lots of perks, though. I can always count on there being some sort of workout toy laying around that I can use on the weekends. I always have a workout buddy if I need one. (The man will never turn down a run, walk, hike, or lunge around the block.) I have someone who supports my healthy eating habits (when pizza gets old) and is always up for new things…including my barley and quinoa goals!

In a nutshell, living with a Fit Bottomed Dude is pretty darn good for the mind, body and soul. These fellas are the kind of gentlemen who motivate us to keep striving to be better versions of ourselves. It’s the best kind of dude to have! Weird, yes. But he keeps me on my toes with his quirkiness. I get videos like this often. Keeps life entertaining. Isn’t my little jumping jack frog cute?!

Can’t see the video? Click  here to watch typical Fit Bottomed Dude behavior.

What about you? Are you dating/married to/besties with a Fit Bottomed Dude? What weird but lovely quirks does he bring to your life? —Tish

Ladies, Gal has a message for you...

Why are you reading about dude-related stuff? Because it’s Fit Bottomed Dudes’ Week, that’s why! Click here for all the special posts, and please share with the guys in your life!

Today’s post is by Gal Josefsberg, a blogger, author, dog owner, husband and entrepreneur. He blogs about personal fitness at 60 in 3, self improvement at Equally Happy and he recently launched a website dedicated to helping men and women find good present ideas for each other called Diamonds or Dogs. He’s not a professional anything, nor does he wish to be. But when it comes to making women feel good just as they are, well, he’s got that message down pat and we love him for it! Read on for his letter to women everywhere… —Jenn

First, a Disclaimer

Let’s get something straight. You don’t need me to tell you you’re perfect. In fact, the most beautiful thing about a woman is her confidence, which means my opinion shouldn’t matter. Seriously, there is nothing more attractive than a confident woman. That look of “take me as I am or get lost” is worth more than any curve, weight, tone, body shape or hair style. I want you to keep that in mind as you read the next few paragraph because I truly believe that my opinion means nothing when it comes to how beautiful a woman looks. So when you think to yourself “Who the hell does this guy think he is? What gives him the right to say this?” The answer is, I don’t have that right and my opinion doesn’t matter. Except it does.

What Do I Mean By That?

I think women have been sold a horrible lie, and I’m not sure by who. I think this lie is that you have to look perfect, that any flaw in your appearance is a deal-killer and will haunt you forever. I think you’ve all been told that you need to look like a Victoria’s Secret lingerie model, and you’ve bought into this, hook , line and sinker. The odd thing is that I’m not sure who told you this because I know it wasn’t us men.

Men Are Easy

We’re not really as sophisticated as you think we are. (I know some of you are thinking “I never thought guys were that sophisticated to begin with,” but I’m saying we’re even less sophisticated than you thought!). I recently saw a magazine article talking about how beautiful Gwyneth Paltrow was and how pretty her symmetrical clavicles are. Seriously? You do know that most of us don’t even know what a clavicle is, right? And if we did, we still wouldn’t look at it. It’s in that dead zone between the breasts and face that we pay no attention to. Same applies to that neck you think is too short, the hips you think are too big or that weird toe you’re so ashamed of. We don’t notice these things, even when you’re naked (especially then since at that point all we’re thinking of is “Woohoo! There’s a naked woman around me!”).

So who sets these impossible standards that make women despair? Fashion magazines? How is that possible when these magazines are trying to cater to women? I’m certainly not their target readership. It’s like there’s a whole industry determined to feed women’s negative body image beliefs and then make money on them. And if it’s so obvious that these magazines set impossible standards, then why do you keep reading them? Why do you keep letting some idiotic fashionista in New York tell you that your body is imperfect when us men are right here and we love you just as you are?

And that right there is the complete truth. There is nothing more attractive than a healthy woman. She is perfect as she is with no need to strive for some impossible fashion standard. We love you and the variety of wonderful shapes your bodies come in. And let me clarify that just to make sure I’m getting my point across: I’m not saying “We love you even if you don’t look like that lingerie model,” I’m saying “We don’t care about that lingerie model look. You look just as good to us.” In fact, let me introduce you to the way men really think.

The Binary System

You know the movie cliché where men rate women on a scale of 1 to 10? Yeah, that’s a load of horse manure. We don’t do that—nor do we only go after 10s. This might be my engineering background showing, but we operate on more of a binary scale. What does that mean? It means there aren’t any gradients of attractiveness as far as we’re concerned. You’re either attractive to us or you’re not, and if you’re attractive then you’re equally attractive as anyone else (including that lingerie model). And by the way, it doesn’t take much work to be attractive—all it takes is being healthy and confident.

If you’re healthy and confident, then we don’t care if you’re apple-shaped or pear-shaped; we love women in all their varied shapes and sizes. We like your odd toe, we love that little bit of fat around the waist (so squeezable!), we adore that wrinkle on your forehead that you got from laughing too much, and we definitely don’t notice if your clavicles are symmetrical or not.

In fact, if there was one thing we could fix about you, it would be to make you love your bodies as much as we do. —Gal Josefsberg

How getting frisky and fitness go together! Credit: Aubry Aragon

This week is all about loving yo’self, but we’d be remiss not to mention a few fun frisky fitness facts about getting your sexy on—be it with yourself or with someone else. So read on for how sex and fitness sort-of, kind-of go hand in hand!

5 Sexy Fitness Facts

1. Working out increases your sex drive. According to a recent survey by Wet (a line of personal lubricants, so probably NSFW), more than 67 percent of respondents said that a workout noticeably increases their sex drive.

2. People go to the gym to check each other out. Like it or not, the dudes at the gym are probably checking you out. According to the same study, more than 71 percent of people admitted to scoping out hotties at the gym.

3. Most of us like to work out with a romantic interest. In fact, more than 61 percent of survey respondents prefer to work out with a buddy. And of those, more than 58 percent like to exercise with a romantic interest. We like to say: Couples who work out together stay together! Or at least are both healthier.

4. Exercise makes us feel more attractive—and do better in the sack. Almost 40 percent of people are motivated to exercise because being in shape makes them feel attractive, while more than 16 percent of people admitted to working out because it increases their sexual stamina.

5. Fit people don’t just date fit people. Those who aren’t gym rats need not fret, according to the survey. More than 86 percent of survey respondents said they would date someone who doesn’t work out.

Do any of these sexy fitness facts and survey results ring true for you? —Jenn

Is this your family's idea of a well-rounded meal? Oye! Credit: ebruli

Today’s post on dealing with an unhealthy family is part of FBG’s Back to Basics Week that features the best beginner fitness and beginner nutrition posts that help you to be a little healthier and—in theme with the week—a little smarter. Read on to learn how, in her own words, reader Beth Osborne has managed to make her stubbornly unhealthy family, a little bit healthier—baby step by baby step.

I come from a family that loves its food. Getting together usually means copious amounts of butter and chocolate. It’s an excellent social time, but it threatens the size of my waist quite a bit. What’s more, in a sea of the slightly portly, I am training for a marathon and am an on-again vegetarian.

It is a constant struggle to try to get my family to eat the same food as me at dinnertime. Since returning home after completing my graduate degree, I find myself going head-to-head with my meat-loving mother. I worry not only for my commitment to this choice I’ve made to eat vegetarian, but also for the health of my 52-year-old mother, as well as the teenage brothers I have. All three are overweight and are hesitant to jump on that treadmill.

It’s a dilemma many people face. One hits that weight wall where they look in the mirror and can’t see a fit person underneath. They get discouraged, get disgusted and give up. The issue heats up whenever I force my tofu scrambles and vegetable-heavy casseroles on a family that would be infinitely happier with hamburgers. I try to sneak veggies in, but to no avail. My own mother picks out the healthy things, opting to eat the grains and cheese instead.

To all of those twenty-somethings (or older!) who are struggling along with me: do not fear! It takes baby steps and concessions on each side in order to make life-changing choices. The stages I often encounter include (but certainly are not limited to), the following…

4 Steps to Help Your Stubborn Family Be a Little Bit Healthier

1. Bargain. If I allow my family to have a junk-infested meal one night (think french fries, chicken nuggets and cheese sauce), I insist we have two nights of health food. By allowing them to get the bad stuff some of the time, I introduce the good without depriving them of the salt and fat they’re used to—thus slowly weaning them off.

2. Guilt them. It sounds bad, I know. I’m not proud of it. But whenever one of my family members complains about the Xs in front of their shirt sizes, I remind them that this situation is not a permanent one. Weight can be changed with a change in attitude, diet and exercise.

3. Retreat to the great outdoors. I will unplug the electronics in the house if that’s what it takes to get my brothers outside for at least a half hour each day. I aim for after dinner since A) that’s when they seem to eat the most, and B) the weather is beautiful.

4. Joke. The power of laughter should never be ignored. By making light of the weight issues in my family, they become more at ease with the issues at hand. An anxious doctor prognosis can be forgotten if we go outside and toss the football around while trying to make our best Stewie impression.

It’s a long road, and I have a feeling both the lean and the large in this situation will struggle for a healthier, happier family. But persistence and confidence does wonders for even the most dire of family circumstance.

Thank you Beth for sharing your story and your tips! Is your family healthy? If not, how do you deal and encourage them to make better choices? —Jenn

Credit: Ha-Wee

If you’re planning to walk down the aisle soon, you’re probably already putting some extra care and attention into eating right and working out. After all, you want to feel and look your best on the big day! But what happens if your fiancé isn’t quite so gung-ho about your healthy lifestyle?

If you’re butting heads with your soon-to-be spouse about how to eat or exercise, or if your loved one is being less than supportive about your weight-loss efforts, these nine tips will help you deal without resorting to drastic measures.

1. Have a frank conversation. Your fiancé is—and will soon legally be—your life partner. If your fiancé’s unhealthy habits are throwing a wrench into your plans of looking radiantly healthy on your wedding day, speak up. It may be that your fiancé is completely unaware that you’re trying to lose weight or become healthier. It may also be that he hasn’t thought about how his behavior is affecting you. Explain why you want to get healthy, and ask for support. Remind your future spouse that this is your future, and you want to set a good example for the rest of your family. It’s hard to say no to that!

Continue reading for nine ways to cope before walking down the aisle…

—Jenn

Sometimes we get random things in the mail at FBG HQ. Today’s review would be one of those random things. Because really, I’m not sure how the DVD Patti Stanger: Married in a Year relates to fitness, but we totally took the bait and popped this one in the our DVD player. Despite the fact that I’m happily married, I am a sucker for pretty much anything on Bravo TV, so I couldn’t resist its reality-TV lure. (Not to mention that it’s Love Yo’Self week and Patti Stanger always preaches on Millionaire Matchmaker that you have to love yourself first before anyone else will.)

So what did I think of this love-focused DVD? Well, it starts out with a pretty long commercial for the Sensa weight-loss system (you know the one where you sprinkle something on your food and—bam!—you look like a model?), which Patti claims she used to drop 20 pounds effortlessly (there’s the fitnessy part, I suppose!). Not only does that message make my fit bottom twitch (eat everything in moderation, listen to your hunger and exercise—oye!) but the fact that there’s an ad before a DVD that people actually buy—and it’s not just a trailer? Um, not a fan.

Then once you get into the meat of the DVD, it’s a somewhat disorganized hodgepodge of Patti giving tips, speaking to an audience of women, and interviews with sex and relationship experts. Patti is obviously best in reality-TV show form and seems very rushed and unnatural on stage and talking to the camera. There are some great tips and information in the DVD, including a 12-month action plan for finding the love of your life, a fascinating and frank conversation between Patti and singles about dating and marriage, and how to even “negotiate” a ring by setting clear boundaries and having honest conversations with your potential mate without freaking him the heck out. There are also helpful tidbits and acted scenes that display how to meet the right guy, how to present your best most authentic self, how to forget the jerks you’ve been with before and what red flags to be aware of.

And the best part? Her first step to finding love is to take three months for you to figure out what you love about yourself and what you want in a mate.

So is it a DVD that single girls should go out and buy? No, not right away. But if it comes up on Netflix or into your local library (or you and a few friends want to split the cost), should you watch it? Totally! And better yet, why not enter to win this DVD by leaving a comment below? U.S. residents only, please, and winners will be contact via email in about a week! —Jenn

Honey, cinnamon, cloves and nutmeg make this dessert sexy!

It wouldn’t be Valentine’s Day and Love Yo’Self Week without a few tasty treats to celebrate with! This honey cake is not only delicious, it’s an aphrodisiac. According to Dr. Lynn Anderson who graciously supplied us with this yummy recipe she created for her book Sex Matters so…Get Sexually Healthy the Natural Way, honey is a complete food used throughout history for endurance, performance and quick recovery time. Pair it with some spices known for their aphrodisiac properties and some wine, and you’re good to go!

Honey Cake Recipe

Ingredients
1/2 c of honey
1/2 c of Strega wine (or any sweet white wine, but Strega is best)
5 egg yolks
7 egg whites
1½ tsp of salt
1 tbsp of grated orange peel
1/2 c plus 2 tablespoons olive oil
1 c whole wheat flour
1/2 tsp each of cinnamon, cloves and nutmeg

Directions
1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

2. Whisk egg yolks with honey for five minutes. Add orange peel. Sift flour with salt and spices. Gradually stir in egg yolks and honey. Add wine and olive oil, stirring constantly as you add small amounts. Beat the egg whites until stiff and fold into batter.

3. Line the bottom of an 8-inch spring-form pan with oiled parchment or a brown paper bag cut to size. Oil the pan and paper well. Pour batter into pan and bake for 20 minutes.

4. Turn oven off and let cake sit for 10 minutes. Remove cake from oven. Turn over and detach from spring pan carefully. Enjoy!

Would you like to learn more about how what you eat, how you exercise and how you think can affect your love and sex life? Leave a comment with your favorite Valentine’s Day treat, and we’ll select one lucky U.S. commenter to win Dr. Lynn’s book Sex Matters so…Get Sexually Healthy the Natural Way in about a week. The winner will be notified by email, so don’t neglect those in-boxes! —Jenn

Credit: Liz Grace

Dating isn’t easy. In the beginning stages, deciding what to wear, where to go and whether you should or shouldn’t kiss can be stressful. Then, once you start to get more serious, you have big decisions to make, such as whether to be exclusive, to live together or to get married. With so much to think about, your healthy lifestyle is probably the last thing on your mind.

Well, it shouldn’t be. According to research from the journal Obesity, dating and cohabiting can lead to weight gain. The 2009 study looked at 1,293 dating, cohabiting and married romantic couples, and found that over five years, women who were dating put on an average of 15 pounds, and those living with a romantic partner gained 18 pounds. Men also have an increased risk of becoming obese as they stay in a relationship, but not nearly as much as women.

Researchers say that when you find someone you really like, you start spending more time with them and therefore adopt some of their less-than-healthy behaviors. Or you cut back on your usual workout time to spend time with your sweetie.

But you don’t have to be a statistic! Continue reading these five tips to enjoy falling in love—without falling off the healthy living wagon.

—Jenn

Looking for a fun yet not overly slutty gift for Valentine’s Day for yourself or your honey? May we suggest the Sexy Love Sox, which not only has a name that makes us giggle like a fifth grader whose science teacher just accidentally said ”orgasm” instead of “organism” (pretty sure that’s happened to everyone in school at least once), is also less than $20 and is guaranteed to give you a good time (or at least make your feet feel really good).

Based on the ancient Chinese technique of reflexology, these unisex, one-size-fits-all, easy-to-use socks show exactly where to press to stimulate the body’s erogenous zones, boost sex drive and improve sexual performance. The idea is that by pressing on specific reflex areas, you can actually stimulate that organ of the body and encourage your partner’s sexual arousal and excitement. And singles, you aren’t left out of the fun either: The socks can also be used by ladies who want to boost their own sex lives without a partner. Ooh-la-la!

Similar to this other pair of reflexology socks and this baby-massage shirt (remember to use protection when using the Sexy Love Sox unless you’d like to have a baby to massage) that we reviewed last year, this pair of socks comes with a detailed guide of information on reflexology and easy-to-follow instructions on how to use them on men and women. I won’t get into too many personal details on how these affected my sex life, but let’s just say that they’re definitely fun and definitely worth packing for a weekend getaway.

Want to try a pair of Sexy Love Sox? Leave a comment telling us about your PG-rated Valentine’s Day plans, and we’ll select one lucky U.S. commenter in a week to win a pair! As usual, the winner will be notified by email. Whose feet are feeling sexy? —Jenn

Whether you’re married, dating or living up the single life, it’s so easy to fall into the trap of having your social life revolve around food and drink. You go out with co-workers for happy hour. You meet friends for coffee. You’re constantly out with your love for dinners on the town. It’s easy to see how it happens: Everyone has to eat, so why not do it together? But believe it or not, there are ways to keep your social life active while burning calories, rather than consuming them. So if you’re tired of the standard dinner and movie night—and want to avoid the high-cal movie theater temptations—here are some ideas for date nights that will get you moving.

Laser tag

Credit: it_will_be_rain_tonight

I had never played laser tag until recently, when my husband and I went out with friends for a laser tag birthday celebration. I had no idea what to expect, and if I had, I would have dressed in short sleeves for sure. You suit up in a vest with sensors, grab a laser gun, and you’re ready to roll. For 15 minutes, you move stealthily around the arena, trying to sneak attack your enemies while trying to avoid being shot yourself.

When I first heard that games only lasted 15 minutes, I was a bit disappointed. It seemed so short. But by the end of 15 minutes, you are sweating both from the adrenaline of the hunt and from moving around so much. I must admit, I was pretty terrible at the game, and only got worse with my second game, but holy cow was it fun. Moving around for 30 minutes total—up and down stairs, too—gave me a good workout. My wrist was even sore the next day from holding the gun.

Skating

Credit: flattop341

I know it’s not exactly the season for ice skating, but just because it’s not Christmas doesn’t mean you can’t get your skate on. Most skating rinks have open skates, and hitting the ice is a great way to cool down from the summer heat, as well as have an excuse to hold hands with your significant other. Plus, you can always go elementary-school style and hit the roller rink. Trust me, once you do the limbo, you won’t have any doubts that skating is a good workout.

Hiking
There’s no doubt that hiking is a good workout. I personally don’t like to hike alone because I watch way too many crime shows. But bringing a friend or partner along on a hike not only helps you have safety in numbers, but it’s also a great opportunity to bond in nature. Bring a picnic and bottle of wine to make it a real date—or at the very least remember to bring lots of water.

Bowling
Strap on those dorky borrowed shoes and start aiming at those pins. I know bowling isn’t the most active date night you can have, but it gets you off the couch, doesn’t it? Plus, whenever I go bowling, I generally get in a few gut-busting belly laughs, so it counts as ab work. Just don’t drink too much beer to offset your calorie burn. And stretch that arm—the only time I have elbow-area soreness is after bowling.

Putt-Putt Golf

Credit: popofatticus

Sure, you won’t get a high calorie burn, but putt-putt is still a fun active date. You’re getting a good 18 holes of walking in, and don’t discount all of the up and down squatting to pick up your ball after you sink a hole in one. Plus, don’t underestimate the amount of effort it takes to get that golf ball up some of those wicked hills they throw at you in the form of igloos and animals.

Dancing
Although I’m terrible at it, I still love to dance. Dancing is great with the man-friends or the lady friends and is a ton of good clean fun. Take a ballroom dance class, and you’ll have a standing date each week to get your groove on. It’s no gym class, but that doesn’t mean you’re not getting exercise. I recently danced my arse off at a wedding, and in my tipsy haze, actually remember thinking, “Wow, my legs are TIRED!” If you’re out on the town, try not to drink so much that you offset the activity, though. Moderation is key.

What are your favorite active dates? Give us your ideas in the comments! —Erin