Moving After Marriage
I apologize in advance for yet another bridal-inspired rant, but I’ve noticed a trend in the wedding community that’s made my fit bottom twitch a number of times: the issue of the boot camp bride-to-be marrying and then quitting the gym like it’s a bad habit.
I’m trying to figure out why in the world this would be. Is marriage such a prize that we honor that one stinking day (wedding day) and then we can just let ourselves go because we’ve finally gotten the darn ring on our finger? Is health only a ploy to getting the guy or gal? That kind of logic makes me want to barf and then some.
Yeah, marrying my guy is something I’ve dreamed about since the minute I first knew he was the one, but I never day-dreamed about what size the dress was. Instead, I looked beyond that to years and years spent with a guy who likes to get up and play and have fun and make life better. Me working out isn’t a symptom of getting married. It’s Fit Bottomed Girl ish! I want to be fit, healthy and strong like an ox for my happily ever after.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I love that getting married entices women who were never really into breaking a sweat to get active. Whatever inspires you to keep on pushing. But, ladies, don’t stop loving your fit and healthy self just because you said “I do.” I hear ridiculous logic like, “Well, I’m off the market now.” And that’s just a feminist’s nightmare if you ask me.
Mark, my fiance, manages a corporate fitness gym, and he sees it all the time. Girls go cray in the gym leading up to the wedding, and then once the day comes, it’s cricket-time at the health club. He never sees them again. That is my nightmare! I work out like a champ right now, and I plan to keep that up for the rest of my life. We women need to learn that looking like someone society has deemed acceptable can’t be and shouldn’t be the prize. The prize is years and years of active and easier living because we keep our bodies healthy and strong.
My mom keeps asking me if I’m making sure to think of the marriage and not just the wedding day. She’s worried I’m gonna be one of those gals who gets married and then says “Now what?” I’m not a “Now what?” woman! I’m a gal with a plan—and that plan involves thinking of my relationship with Mark and myself as a work in forever progress. I’m going to be moving and shaking for the rest of my happy, long life!
What about you? Have you seen this trend? What are your thoughts on post wedding fitness? —Tish
Comments
UGHHHH this burns my buttons too, it’s always Bridal Bootcamp, or Post Baby Bootcamp… and my fave.. BIKINI bootcamp. Seriously, I work out all year round to be healthy and look good…a wedding, baby, or time of year should not be the catalyst for fitness. Being fit and healthy is a lifestyle. (cliché) but true.
@Ayana YES! I didn’t even think about the other incentives, but you’re totally right! I dig your cliche.
I’ve experienced this in my personal training business. It’s not fun. It’s also why I no longer market specifically to brides.
So very true, Tish!!!
You ROCK!!!
Great point. A wedding is a great inspiration to get in shape but you have to plan ahead and make it a lifestyle change.
Recently discovered your site and I’ve been lurking, but this struck a chord with me. I’m getting married in September and this is exactly what I DON’T want to do. Of course,I want to look good in the wedding pictures, but thinking about “forever” has been a kickstart for me to reevaluate my lifestyle. My paternal grandmother lived to be 87, but she spent the last decade of her life largely housebound due to complications from type 2 diabetes. My maternal grandparents are still living, but my grandfather suffered a heart attack brought on by high cholesterol a couple of years ago. Not only do I want to be a healthy and active senior citizen, but I owe it to my fiance too. I’ve started exploring clean eating so that I can cook healthy meals for us and our children, and trying to get to the point where working out 5 days a week is a habit and not a chore.
Of 3 female friends who got married in the last 2 years, all of them quit working out within a month after their weddings. You are on to a national epidemic thing here Tish.
LOL. It happened to me just this week. A friend at work told me that since I’m married I don’t have to workout now.
No, No, NO! It’s for life.
I didn’t work out until AFTER I got married (but, ok, I was 23 when I got married). 11 years (and 2 kids) later and I’m in the best shape ever. I want to stay fit and healthy so I can enjoy a long, happy life with my guy! Retirement (in 30 years) will also be much more fun if we are still active and energetic.
Let’s face it, we all go thru times when we want to look better and theres times we let ourselves go too but I think its important after marriage to at least stay fit and be someone your partner can be proud of without needing to be a fitness fanatic.
It’s different for me. I love going to the gym and I only started after I got married. Stopped a while after Baby One, continued, then stopped again for Baby 2. It was a challenge to find time to go to the gym or even to have a jog or walk…Now that baby is older…looking forward to start off again.
speaking from personal experience, the pre-wedding increase in exercise was born out of deep insecurity about my physical appearance, which is on display as the center of attention as the bride and would be captured in photos. The pressure was off following the big day, and other things took priority. I never stopped going to the gym completely, though.
Add on pregnancy and suddenly there is more anxiety about whether or not your body will fall apart.
The things that brought me back to a consistent fitness regimen were not born out of my pre-wedding anxieties- they were deeper – I knew my body created 3 children and felt empowered. I also had a overpowering desire to be around for my family, with energy & vitality that can only come from being physically fit. I want to look and feel good for myself, but it’s the confidence from fitness that nurtures attraction and intimacy with my husband.
Oh, and HELLO! Stress relief! Mama is in a much better mood when she’s worked out!
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