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Straight Out of a Sitcom: Tish’s Epic Return to the Doc

endoscopy, waiting room, doctor results, family guy

This is waiting room hell. Credit: Robert Couse-Baker, Flickr

So I had the endoscopy back in December. I had to wait a whole month to meet with the doctor who did the procedure! Who does that?! Cruel people, that’s who! I know for my New Year’s goals post post I specifically mentioned being more proactive about finding out results considering my health, so I had to suck it up and just go even though I was left with the HUGE burden of knowing I could possibly have the “C” word: cancer. That’s heavy and then some! So heavy I didn’t want to go … I totally had to put on my big-girl panties.

So I got there. Waited an hour for the doc to see me, and when he finally came in he said, “Let me take a minute to review your file.” (You had a month and an hour! You couldn’t look at that before coming into the room?!) I smiled and buried my frustration while he browsed the results — and then it happened. He looked up and said the following:

“Ohhhhkay, so we did the endoscopy so that we could do two things: Take some biopsies and do a scraping of your esophagus. Both procedures should reveal if you have infections that could mean cancer.”

He then paused for a good minute to read.

“Ohhh-kay, so it looks like you do … in fact … have an infection.”

My heart drops.

“Oh wait! No. This writing is confusing. They’re wording it weird. Let me just read this and make sure that I’m getting it right.”

More pausing.

“No cancer! That was confusing. You’re fine.”

Who does that?! I seriously about lost my shit. (Pardon my language.) So yeah … I DON’T have cancer or anything bad going on in my gut. Turns out, I’m just super sensitive to acid and the muscle that prevents acid from shooting up into my throat is weakened, so I have to take meds to keep that from happening. This medicine could possibly cause facial twitches, BUT the doctor says only for a month and if the twitches start I can go off of it.

This is good news, though … right? I write about butt twitches all the time (in fact, my first post mentioned them!), but I’m not so keen on facial twitches. Cancer scare, facial twitches … I’m a mess, y’all! I’m going to continue to handle this and get it all under control, though!

A friend wrote recently and said my story reminded her of this Family Guy moment. That is SO how it was. Darn doctors! Curious if you’ve ever had something like this happen? How did you NOT attack your doctor? How do you handle the stress of scary doctor visits, diagnosis, etc.? – Tish

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