Loss and Tears Get in the Way — and That’s Okay

We’re usually so upbeat and cheerful around here that it feels weird to be writing what is far from a happy post. But Jenn and I have never been shy about sharing our love for our Fit Bottomed Pets, so it feels even weirder to skip over the loss of a pet like it didn’t happen.

In early July, we lost my beloved pug, Marti, who has made her appearance here numerous times over the years. We’d been back and forth to the vet too many times to count over the last couple of months trying to narrow down why she was sick, and during the last-ditch effort of doing exploratory surgery last month, we discovered it was cancer in her intestines that had spread. We had to let her go.


My family and I are heartbroken, to say the least, and I’ve shed so many tears over the last few weeks that I’m surprised I don’t have grooves where my tears have flowed. She had been a member of our family for almost nine years, and she’s been by my side all day, every day, and in my desk chair behind me since I started working from home in 2007. The house is too quiet without her snorts and snuffles and snores and incessant barking when I’d leave the house. The house is too clean without the constant “dust pugs” I was always finding like tumbleweeds in the corners.

I’m no stranger to grief and loss, having lost my dad very early and suddenly in 2005, but every loss makes its mark on your heart. I’m getting better — crying less, questioning our decisions less — but I’ll say that grief tends to derail your life. Between Marti, being 32 weeks pregnant and having my third stupid sinus infection of the year (thanks, pregnancy immune system), fitness and workouts have been the last thing on my mind. My comfort foods have been Dunkin Donuts decaf iced coffees and Trader Joe’s cheese enchiladas. Because sometimes you just need a treat and other times you just don’t feel like cooking while crying. I know workouts will eventually resume — they always do — but sometimes you just have to take time off when your body is telling you that no systems are a “go” right now. And it’s been a couple of days since I’ve had sugary iced coffee and even longer since the cheese enchiladas, so there’s hope.

To celebrate Marti’s mark on the Fit Bottomed World, I thought I’d link to a few of my favorite posts that mentioned her on this site and over on Fit Bottomed Mamas. I hope you enjoy.

Health Lessons from my Dog

The Fit Bottomed Rules of Pet Ownership

Chubby Baby + Pug Hug = Too Much Cuteness

Our Perfect Family Dog: Cute With a Lot of Patience

Puppies and Babies: The Similarities are Endless

Marti also made appearances on FBM’s relatively new Instagram page and in her biggest and highest tech achievement, garnered almost 700 likes when she was featured by Purina proplan’s instagram when Jenn and I did a Twitter party about dogs and fitness. Quite an accomplishment!

Until next time, do me a favor and hug your pets just a little tighter. And maybe give them an extra treat or two. —Erin

FTC disclosure: We often receive products from companies to review. All thoughts and opinions are always entirely our own. Unless otherwise stated, we have received no compensation for our review and the content is purely editorial. Affiliate links may be included. If you purchase something through one of those links we may receive a small commission. Thanks for your support!


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  1. Samantha says:

    I’m so sorry about your loss. Our pets are like members of our family, and their loss hits us just as hard. My thoughts and best wishes are with you and your family.

  2. Brittani says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss! We just lost our 14 year old lab Cooper to cancer a month ago and while the crying bouts are further and far between, there is still a hole in my heart. I’m praying for you and your family. I know Cooper and Marti are in doggie heaven running around and eating copious amounts of treats

  3. Kristen says:

    Well, here I go crying all over again, but man, she was one cool pup. Missing her lots and thinking of you.

  4. Breanna says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss! I just lost my 13 year old Chocolate Lab, Molly a couple months ago to laryngeal paralysis and not having her around hasn’t gotten any easier. But, Molly and Marti aren’t in pain anymore and are running around and playing at the rainbow bridge!

  5. Shauna says:

    I had to put down my chow about 5 months ago and I still cry immediately upon mention of him. Losing a pet is (in my opinion) like losing a member of your family. The pain doesn’t get better, it just get’s manageable. And all that means is that you love your pet with all you had. And that’s the best kind of love. Wishing you and the fam lots of pet hugs from Atlanta.

  6. Kate says:

    My heart goes out to you. I have a 12 year old pug on whom I spend in excess of $200 a month for his arthritis and compressed discs. He is my third child and a total member of our family. I understand.

  7. Emily P says:

    So sorry for your loss! I know how hard it is to say good-bye to a beloved pet. Our golden retriever, who we’ve had for the last 8 years, is now 13 and I know that day will be coming soon for us as well. I’m sure your kids are missing her, too, which only adds to your grief. Sending hugs your way!

  8. Amanda says:

    I am so sorry. I also lost my pug, my best girl, in November. She was only five, but she and I shared a bachelorette pad, and then a home, a marriage, and a baby. I cried every day for months and although I still miss her, the memories of her bring a smile to my face every time. Pug hugs to you!

  9. xxfactor says:

    Very very sad news. I’m so sorry for your loss, Erin. Hang in there. Virtual hugs to you, from all us dog lovers.

  10. Kate L says:

    Ugh, it’s the worst when you lose a pet! It is so hard and yet we ( or at least I did) feel like somehow we aren’t truly allowed to be heartbroken. Dogs are our most loyal companions and their loss is truly awful. Hoping for you that it passes soon (sounds like it’s starting to and your cheese enchilada ratio is starting to even out!) and you have wonderful memories.

  11. Jessica W says:

    I’m so sorry! We lost our 11-year-old boxer in May when I was 21 weeks pregnant. He died exactly a week after we found out we were expecting a girl. We truly loved him like a son and it was devastating. I neglected the gym and the yoga studio for 2 weeks and ate what I wanted. Baby and I are just fine. Just be good to yourself….the workouts will be there when you’re ready. My thoughts are with you.

  12. amber says:

    so, so sorry for your loss!! sending hugs, love and light!! ♥