37 Thoughts Every Woman Has During Pregnancy

It’s a paradox that is absolutely true: Pregnancy and motherhood are different for everyone, but they’re also so, so much the same for everyone too. There are just certain universal things every woman experiences when she’s gestating a tiny human. We know this because Jenn and I are constantly comparing pregnancies — and it’s somewhat reassuring to know someone else dealt with the exact same weirdness you did (like, recently, how can you be hungry and full at the same time?!)! Here are just a few thoughts that just about every pregnant woman has at some point during those blissful 40 weeks.

37 Thoughts Every Woman Has During Pregnancy

I’m having a baby!

There is a HUMAN inside of me.

Is that bloat? Or a bump? Probably bloat. I mean, the baby is only the size of a blueberry.

Is that a kick or gas?

That’s a kick.

He/she will be a soccer player!

Ow. Or a kickboxer.

Did he just kick my cervix?

Life is such a miracle!

OMG, I cannot get comfortable.

So glad I have my doctor on speed dial.

Where’s a bathroom?

No, seriously, I need one NOW.

I just peed myself while sneezing. That was new.

That is definitely a bump.

Where did my waist go?

I can’t eat anything.

I want to eat everything.

These pants are too tight.

My hubby is the freaking BEST.

How DARE HE.

I can’t see my feet.

Where did my ankles go? Will they come back?

I can’t bend to tie my shoes.

I really miss crossing my legs.

How many times can one wake to pee in the night?

I could set a world record, I’m sure.

I’ll never take sleeping on my stomach or back for granted ever again.

My baby is the size of a large vegetable!

That large vegetable has to … come out?

THAT LARGE VEGETABLE HAS TO COME OUT.

Are those hiccups? That is the most adorable thing EVER.

This baby is torturing me!

I am so not ready! I hope this baby stays in for awhile.

Will this pregnancy ever end?

Will I be a good mom?

I will be the BEST MOM.

What did we miss? —Erin