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Why Can’t They Just Stay In Bed!?

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Like this, only that elbow is jabbing someone in the face.

When we first started bed training Evan, it was bliss. He stayed all night and called for me in the morning when he was ready to get his day going. Very similar to his commands from the crib. Easy. I can handle this! That lasted a few short weeks. Actually, days. I’m not sure we even made it a full week.

My mister is almost 2-and-a-half and crawls into bed with Jake and me E-V-E-R-Y night. He climbs right over me and plops down between both of us, as if that spot was saved for him. He doesn’t speak to either of us, he pulls his desired blankets over his slim body and chooses a parent to curl up to and falls asleep. Quietly and sweetly, he falls into his own toddler slumber. It starts off sweet and picture perfect, but throughout the night Jake and I take turns getting a leg in the back or an arm to the face. I’ve tried carrying him back to his room and staying with him until he falls asleep. He would cry and kick and scream and just wants me to lie down with him. Sometimes I’m so exhausted that I cave in and crawl into bed with him until he falls asleep then awkwardly climb out of his bed as though it was surrounded by land mines. It’s evident that he doesn’t like to be alone. At nap time and bed time he will not fall asleep unless someone is there the entire time.

But I am getting bigger, and sleep is getting less comfortable. I toss and turn the good ol’ pregnancy way and having a toddler in bed makes it that much more difficult. We have a tough time moving him because he looks so sweet and comfortable. Even a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors doesn’t lead to follow-through. Some days we don’t know he’s there until until the morning — scary, I know! I’ve scoured the internet for postings on kids sleeping and consulted with our pediatrician. I know we need to just keep picking him up and putting him in his bed. I am guilty of letting these habits continue and am nervous for when Baby number 2 arrives. I’m 30 weeks into this pregnancy and just too lazy to get out of bed and carry him to his. Excuses, I realize. Yet I am still seeking advice!

I feel like David After Dentist, “Is this going to be forever?” Will he outgrow it or will he be crawling into our bed after his homecoming dance? Will I miss this? What worked for you?Jennifer

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Comments

5 Comments
  1. stephanie says:

    We just started bed-training our second child two nights ago. AND–we just moved into a new house, so our girls are in separate rooms now. And there’s a ceiling fan, which I’m pretty sure she’s afraid of in the dark. They’ve been a rough two nights. In the wee hours of this very morning, I heard our almost-3-year-old wandering around the house, squeaking and moaning and talking to herself in the mudroom–the one room in the house where the lights were still on. Eventually, by the time I got our third child (who’s almost 5 months old) put back to sleep and went out to find her, she was crying by the door, by all appearances thinking we’d all left while she was asleep.

    I carried her back to her room and put her in her bed, then laid down on the floor beside her. Every time I moved, she sat up and waited for me to lie back down. After a little while, she got back to sleep, but then she scooted over just far enough that she fell off the bed, and onto me. She was easy to settle down, because she realized I was right there the whole time. BUT… before either of us got back to sleep, my alarm went off, and it was a few minutes before only the baby was still asleep and everyone else was getting up and ready to head out.

  2. Jenn B says:

    I had that problem with my 3 yr old for well her entire life. Recently I read an article that has actually helped. If your child comes to bed with you around the same time every night. Try and briefly wake them up(kiss good night, bathroom etc) before you go to bed. That way it breaks the sleep cycle enuf that they go back to sleep and stay In bed. Also maybe a night light or something to cuddle, To replace the parent? I hope you guys find something that works. My 1 yr old sleeps better than my almost 4 yr old ha!

  3. I am in the same boat. Baby #1 is three and will only fall asleep in our bed. We carry her into her room, and around 3 am, she’s back in our bed. I’m 22 weeks pregnant with baby number 3, so she needs to GET IN HER OWN DARN BED!!! Easier said then done. Especially because she shares a room with baby #2. (We only have two bedrooms upstairs.) help! Share any advice you find!

  4. karla says:

    Yep. Our son is 7. He still won’t fall asleep by himself or stay in his room all night long. We ended up just making him a bed in our room, on the floor. There are nights he begs to be in bed with us, but I insist he sleeps anywhere but our bed. Sometimes I fall back to sleep with my arm hanging over the side of the bed holding his hand. Families have been co-sleeping for a long time. I think it’s a natural drive for a child to feel safe and protected while sleeping near his parents. But it is still a problem. No sleep overs or summer camp. I am hoping he will get to the point where he really wants to learn the skill of staying in his bed all night. Until then, I give up.

  5. Liss says:

    Did you ever find a solution? I literally am experiencing this to a T only I have my third on the way and my oldest sleeps fine it’s my second that won’t sleep in his bed all night 😭

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