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Things This FBG Does Not Understand

I like to think I’m a pretty smart cookie most of the time, but there are certain things that really leave me confused. Like, I cannot wrap my head around them. I know that they exist and happen and other people don’t bat an eye, but, in my active, workout-filled, FBG-ified world? I just do not understand.

And I have a feeling a few of my fellow active ladies out there will feel me on this. (Although, those of you who don’t — please feel free to explain anything I may be missing! I want to learn your tricks!)

FBG does not understand

Credit: JLee Photography

Blowouts that last more than maybe a day or two. It’s not that I need to wash my hair everyday (hahaha, oh hell no), but I rarely go that long without doing something that leaves my hair all sweaty. So, at some point in the 36 to 48 hours after an appointment, that nice sleek style from the salon is long gone. (Hashtag FBG problems.)

Those cute bustier-type bikini tops. In an attempt to shake up my swimsuit style a little (because I’m pretty much an all triangle top, all the time gal, and my tan lines already show it), I tried on a strapless, push uppy type of number — in fact, I think it was this one. Cute, right? Except, how do you … do things in it? I wouldn’t be able to throw a football, play volleyball (or Spikeball!), or even swim around a little without things getting really indecent really quickly. It’s not like I’m so terribly busty (although I did recently have a bra fitting for the first time in a couple of years and … sizes change, ladies, so get measured once in a while, is what I’m sayin’). So how does this work? Are these tops strictly for lounging? Nothing wrong with that, but if there’s a way to do fun stuff in a top like this without the risk of getting arrested, I’d love to know.

Packing only a carry on bag for a trip longer than, like, three days. I can pare down my toiletries without much hassle, and I’m good at mixing and matching casual clothes to make the same pieces work multiple days. But between sneakers and socks and sports bras and, you know, shorts and tops, plus maybe a hat and a water bottle and running watch and … you get the idea. Exercise gear takes up some space, and if I’m gone for a few days, you’d better believe I’m bringing at least a couple of outfits that’ll work for workouts.

Anybody out there share my confusion? Got any to add? —-Kristen

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