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Do You Put Conditions on Your Self-Love?

We all know how important self-love is. And, here on this site and in this community, we talk a lot about how your weight and size shouldn’t determine your self-worth. In fact, it’s a huge part of our mission.

But one thing I’ve noticed — in myself as well as others — is that even if we can get to a place where we feel great (or at least neutral) about our bodies, that unconditional self-love and grace doesn’t always translate over to other areas of our lives.

See if this strikes a chord with you …

Do you feel worthy if — and only if  — one (or even many or all) of these conditions are met?

  • You are succeeding at work
  • Your home is clean
  • You have a certain amount of money in your bank account
  • Your wardrobe is on trend
  • Your closets and cabinets are organized
  • Everything is checked off of your to-do list
  • Your inbox is at zero
  • Your children are succeeding (or not having any major issues)
  • You’re healthy / not injured

I tend to not think of myself as a perfectionist, but I gotta admit, a lot of those conditions give me the feels. Because many times I won’t allow myself to feel my best if some of them aren’t met.

(And yes, I do mean I won’t allow it, because any time you put an “if” or a “when” on what’s required in order for you to feel happy and experience true self-love, that’s a way of not allowing yourself to feel worthy.)

Which is crazy! When I think of the people in my life that I cherish, in no way would I withhold unconditional love from them because they were buried in email or had exploding closets or weren’t saving enough money. Never, ever!

But when it comes to myself? Whoa. Reality check.

How about you? Did this give you some new insight on how much unconditional love you really and truly give yourself? Like we always say with body image work, the first step to breaking free and changing is always awareness! –Jenn

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